love is in the air

Love is in the Air

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And you know what that means.

TIME TO RUN THE EVENT DUNGEON HUNDREDS OF TIMES TO GET THE MOUNT THAT NEVER DROPS.

Aysa's upset that she has no big pink love rocket.
Aysa’s upset that she has no big pink love rocket.

Thanks to the fancy new dungeon scaling tech, you no longer need to be at/near max level to queue for this event dungeon. So long as you’re level 16 or higher, you can set yourself up for disappointment many times a day!

REJOICE as you tentatively log onto characters and classes you haven’t used since Warlords, or even Pandaria! BE CONFUSED as you figure out what the hell you press to make your druid actually do something. GRIMACE as you accidentally queue as healer when you’re in a DPS spec.

But more important than this mount? Yes, that’s right. It’s time for me to complain that the BEST-looking non-eyepatch headgear is still not classed as a cosmetic item, or even eligible for transmogrification.

JESUS CHRIST
Vile Fumigator’s Mask

FIX IT, BLIZZARD.

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CITIZENS OF DALARAN

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RAISE YOUR EYES TO THE SKIES AND OBSERVE

Love is still in the air, and I’m going to blog about the Crown Chemical Co. runs I am doing because… because I can, okay?

We’ll start with…

Lillorigga

lillo

Lillorigga has switched from Gladiator to Fury again, because if I can’t do sword & board DPS in Legion, I might as well get used to something else. Shame though, I liked Gladiator. Bring it back in the future, ‘kay Blizz?

Spoils: 6 Love Tokens, 24 Gold, Toxic Wasteling.

Ooh.

Shamwhoa

shamwhoa

Shamwhoa’s Restoration, so that hopefully means SUPER FAST QUEUE. Restoration Shaman are possibly my 2nd favourite healer at the moment.

Spoils: 10 Love Tokens, 17 Gold, Vile Fumigator’s Mask

JESUS CHRIST
JESUS CHRIST

Lixiu

lishoe

Always so happy. Always so Beast Mastery. Always with a Shale Spider. She’s blue da ba dee da ba di, but not in a sad way, but because of her clothes.

Spoils: 7 Love Tokens, 20 Gold, Forever Lovely Rose

NO.

Disgleirio

disflexio

It’s always a /flex. Draenei ladies have the best /flex in the game. She’s Retribution, because I don’t have a shield for her and also I am not very fond of Paladin tanks. Just in general.

Spoils: 8 Love Tokens, 23 Gold

UGH!

Sunbuer

disco

A HOODLUM. A LOUT. A HOODED YOUTH. A Priest of Discipline actually.

Spoils: 7 Love Tokens, 19 Gold

IT’S GETTING WORSE SOMEHOW

Vanlew

lightsaber

NO they are not lightsabers, they are magical swords of… light. Vanlew, the soon-to-be Outlaw.

Spoils: 6 Love Tokens, 19 Gold AJSKDNJSKQKD

Gestherya

gestherya

I hate Blood so she’s Frost now. She’ll also have someone’s eye out with those shoulder spikes if she’s not careful. Her own, most likely.

Spoils: 5 Love Tokens, 19 Gold, Forever Lovely Rose

BUT WHAT ABOUT MY FOREVER LOVELY ROCKET?!

Shawujing

shawuwu

My Monk healer is so criminally underplayed he doesn’t even have a transmog yet. This is tantamount to abuse.

Spoils:  10 Love Tokens, 17 Gold

SEVENTEEN?!

Fujikomine

fujiko

The other Rogue. The one with the eyepatch. She lost her eye during a rather vigorous game of squash.

Spoils: 9 Love Tokens, 15 Gold

FIFTEEN?! Rip off.

Lunchi

lunchinew

The other Monk. She’s blindfolded so she can’t see the disappointing reward bag.

Spoils: 6 Love Tokens, 16 Gold

Shokei

shield
Shokei. Today’s last hope for the mount. You also see her loyal Wrathguard, and his nipple. We all love a good nipple or two, don’t we?

Spoils: 9 Love Tokens, 15 Gold.

CONCLUSION

The love rocket can go fuck itself.

…NOT THAT I’LL STOP TRYING TO GET IT.