THIS IS FAR FROM THE STRONGEST OF SWORDS

Oops sorry, no swords here, but here we do have the finest hat. The best hat. The most… tentacular.

But all these fabulous fedoras, these stunning sombreros, this majestic millinery, these brilliant bowlers, they distract us from the most important thing.

Stealth follower missions are the biggest piles of shit in this entire expansion

Thanks for your time.

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Oh, in other news, I’m going to give you some advice on the LFR fight MOTHER.

• Nominate someone who knows the fight. Make them group leader so they can send raid alerts.
• Tank in group 1, Other tank in group 5. Healer in each.
• Send over groups one at a time from one room to the next. Wait until everyone’s healed, send in the next group.
• Kill the adds.
• DON’T all run into the second room at once. You’ll die.
• DON’T keep MOTHER in the first room until it explodes. You’ll die.

Thanks for playing.

Oh, and bounce the ball on Zek’voz. If you don’t, you guessed it, you’ll die.

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THEY COME

The Old Gods are coming! The Old Gods are coming! THOQ FSSH N’ZOTH! ETH’RAZZQI WORG ZZ OU! A̭͍͕̦̠̭̿͌̓̆Q̣͚͎̭̤̣Ě̬̮̙̰̣̻͌V́̅ͮ̍ A̯̯̪̱ͥ̌̓͊̆ͪ̚Q̘̖̰̺͉̪̭͎ͫ̆̄͑͊̎E̜̘̲̱̮̘̯͇ͭ͑͊̎ͥ͒V̜͙̥͇̺̰̰̾͆ A͈̩̼͚̗͓̖͒Q̗̪̻͉ͫ͛͜͝E̴̢̥̲̻͎̦̞̣͐̿ͩ͌ͅV̧̛͓͇̄͡

I mean, probably.

Things I Love In The Prepatch So Far

• 8.0 Demonology is honestly the best, most fun iteration of Demonology I have ever played! It combines the demon summoning of Legion (but cuts out the boring Demonic Empowerment spam) with the Molten Core gameplay of Mists (but cuts out the stupid Metamorphosis weaving) and honestly, it ends up being something just supremely fun and interesting! Plus, the chance to summon Prince Melchezaar is just lovely. Give me Jaraxxus too and I’ll never change spec again.
• Sticking on the Warlock front, 8.0 Affliction is actually rather interesting too. Reap Souls has thankfully gone into the bin (sadly so has Soul Flame but we can’t have everything our way), and I enjoy the Deathbolt gameplay so far. Going back to a casted filler rather than a channelled one feels a bit better as well. No more do I feel like a bargain basement Shadow Priest.
• STORY. MORE STORY. It’s not exactly going the way I’d like it to so far, but I am confident there’ll be some interesting twists and turns. REMEMBER PEOPLE, this is just the prologue to the expansion, there’s a shitload more stuff to come, and I fully expect some of it to be tentacular.
• I like that Mistweaver Monk has the castable Soothing Mist back, and you can do instant Vivify/Enveloping Mist through it. Makes it a little different to other healers. Plus I love Fistweaving, and a few of their new talents gives that gameplay style a very tidy little boost. Can’t wait to test it out in a raid environment!
• The anticipation everyone has for the new expansion. It’s so close!

Also I am enjoying levelling this minx up

Things I Hate In The Prepatch So Far

• Something feels like it’s “missing” from Destruction. Probably the lack of fire-spewing portals from the artifact. I liked those.
• “Your talents have been reset” nooooooo now I have to look things up!
• I, like many, many others, am a little miffed at the events that have transpired in the story recently. Still, there’s another week to go, and I suspect the Alliance will get a satisfying retribution. For all the moaning that the Alliance is losing an important racial capital on Kalimdor, it’s important to remember the Horde are losing their only bastion on the Eastern Kingdoms too. Whether or not that is a like-for-like is up to you to decide, but this whole faction conflict does not seem entirely one-sided. Shame it has to be the Horde ACTING, and the Alliance REACTING yet again though.
• Inxy, the lovely Goblin up there, is currently flying around the WoD zones, levelling via bonus areas and collecting treasures, and rocketing her way to level 100. Kinda wish that was viable in Legion content too. Powerlevel via exploration!
• Sylvanas’s movie needed a sea shanty like Jaina’s. Yo ho ho and a bottle of plague, that sorta thing.