Three

Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
I’m stuck in a lockdown
Happy birthday to me

THIRTY FOUR YEARS OLD

We can’t do my traditional “go to Swansea and eat infinite food” plan, so we’ve postponed that for the time being, but the boyfriend is still being lovely. He’s made a cake of some descript (it’s a surprise!), and we’re getting a takeaway pizza delivery later on, plus he’s got me Fire Emblem Three Houses and a MYSTERY GIFT, both of which should arrive later today.

It’s an unusual birthday, to be sure, but I’m enjoying it so far. Though I’ve only been up for an hour so let’s see how shit goes!

POKEMON

So I’m in front of the fourth gym, and here’s my team at the moment! Sirfetch’d, Pangoro, Decidueye, Inteleon, The Fabulous Rapidash, and Cinderace! Okay I have two fighting types in there (bird/panda) but I’m still enjoying the relative balance of it. Still might throw a Koffing in there at some point. I called mine Talbot, because Galarian Weezing reminds me of the smokestacks of Port Talbot, in South Wales.

I’ve always enjoyed how cheerful Koffing is, and I love how Galarian Weezing just looks very dapper with his top hat and fancy facial “hair”.

THE RAVAGES OF AGE

Last year for my birthday, I got the most delightful present of all!  A BAD BACK! Because I sneezed while doing something else, and my body decided to punish me for it.

This year, my hands are dry and falling apart because I dared to eat something tomato-based recently, and I have an intolerance/mild allergy to tomato, so it causes digestive distress and my skin to break out in weird scaly chalky nonsense.

I think this means I need to moisturise? Like an actual gay? Take more care in my appearance and not just hope that shower gel and hand soap is enough?

Moisturiser with built-in bronzer? OH GO ON THEN.

OTHER THINGS

  • I really wanted to go to Swansea, you guys.
  • Espresso martinis in Turtle Bay!
  • INFINITE FOOD in Nines, Swansea’s premier all you can eat establishment!
  • Browsing for classic games in Swansea Market!
  • Discovering a new energy drink that later I see EVERYWHERE (last year it was the pink one!)
  • I mean I understand WHY. Obviously, social distancing is very important to combat the coronavirus ravaging the population, and if restaurants and shops are open, it’s too tempting to think “well I’ll be fine” and go out regardless of goverment advice.
  • BUT! I can still mourn my birthday not being how I would have envisaged. My solace is that I am with a bf who loves me, who wants to make this day as good as it can be, and that at some point when this all blows over, we will GORGE ourselves at Nines, or Za Za Bazaar in Bristol, and it can be a second birthday for me.
  • Because I’m the motherfucking QUEEN, bitches.

7 thoughts on “Three

  1. Tessa - Narratess

    Happy birthday! Thirties are a bitch with so many unwanted presents and you’re definitely getting them 😦 I hope you can celebrate your birthday for real soon with lots of good food and fun.

    Reply
  2. welshtroll

    I got to 40 last year and got high-blood pressure, it wasn’t even on my Amazon Wishlist!

    It’s sucky that you can’t celebrate how you would like, but i agree a second birthday like the Queen is entirely sensible.

    Reply
  3. randompanda1010

    Happy birthday! It is not the best way to celebrate, but definitely nice when someone goes all out to try to make it the best. Hopefully we will all be able to go out and a second birthday is a great idea!

    Reply
  4. Solarayo

    Happy birthday!!! I hope this virus goes away soon and you enjoy an awesome meal with your bf when it does 🙂

    Reply

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