ALTER MANN

Last month I turned 33, which in gay years means I’m basically this old:

You sort of hit that the moment you turn 20 though (seriously at the age of 21, way back when, I was asked “don’t you think you’re too old to go gay clubbing now?” by a friend and honestly I’ve never felt more offended), and every year adds a new wrinkle. 33 has brought with it the concern that I will throw my back out every time I sneeze (which I have done twice in the last week and am currently suffering from today. Hayfever was an annoyance in my youth; today flowers are liable to kill me) and grey hairs that I have finally LOCATED and will be DYEING to COVER them UP at the earliest CONVENIENCE.

I’m also trying to convince the boyfriend that when he picks up his glasses from Asda Opticians, he should ask for “my new spectacles” and put the stress on a different syllable every time he says it.

specTAcles!

But this blog isn’t about me griping (actually it can be, it’s my blog and I can write whatever I like), it’s about VIDEO GAMES and let me tell you I have played some VIDEO GAMES recently.

World of Warcraft!

  • Officially ahead of the curve! Bring it on Azshara, you tentacle witch!
  • Speaking of tentacles, Fuhai still has the gift of N’Zoth, because he is our master and he will bring deliverance to all.
  • YRR N’LYETH, SHUUL ANAGG!
  • *clears throat*
  • Honestly I’ve been logging in for raids and little else recently. I still love the game, but I’ve been dipping my toe into other games too recently, like…

Disgaea 5 Complete!

I’ve owned it for two weeks and I’ve sunk so much time into it. I had it on the PS4, traded it in after I finished the story and some of the postgame, and really regretted it because I missed out on SO much stuff. It’s a wonderful game because you can take characters that have stats like this at the start of the game:

And through the use of levelling, stat boosts, subclass mastering and whatnot, give them stats that look more like this:

Yes, those stats are in the TENS OF MILLIONS, and I’m not even halfway to the stat cap (99,999,999 for everything bar HP which can go to 99,999,999,999! NINETY NINE BILLION!). Disgaea takes grinding as a concept and dials it up to 11. You level up characters, you level up your items, you get stronger and stronger and stronger until you overcome the ultimate challenge, Baal (who is the ultimate challenge in like every Disgaea game so this is not a spoiler).

Disgaea 5, of course, turns the Baal fight up to 11 too by not just pitting you against a single Baal, but MULTIPLE of him. It’s ridiculous and I love it. It’s a far cry from Disgaea 1 where he was “just” level 4000 and there was “just” one of him.

Football Manager 2019!

Bolton Wanderers in real life have had a disastrous season, given that they had to forfeit their last game because their playing staff went on strike due to going unpaid for months, the administrators have been called in, the ownership saga is full of messy drama, and they start next season in League One with -12 points. Fantastic!

Bolton Wanderers in Football Manager 2019, as managed by me, are top of the Championship, are in good financial health, and our next game is in the Carabao Cup vs Chelsea, which I will totally not save scum until I get a victory, honest.

Oops my fingers slipped and pressed ALT+F4, sorry about that.

Gosh, these last two games have basically been spreadsheets in colourful formats haven’t they? But what can I say, I love number-crunching games!

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