The OFFICIAL “Best Races in World of Warcraft” List!

Posted on

It’s official because I say so.

Let’s start with the (un)lucky losers.

13) WORGEN

Like, you’re cool and all but I just can’t with the sniffing and the opening area. I don’t WANT to do Gilneas. You can’t make me!

I can’t even include a picture of one because I just can’t DO Gilneas, it makes me want to scream, so here’s a dog instead.

nocake

12) NIGHT ELF

Let’s be honest here, Malfurion’s really holding you back here. He’s such an endpiece, you need to get rid.

druidlose

11) HUMAN

I’m human. You’re (I assume?) human too. Human’s like the most BORING choice anyone could make. Who’d even make their main one anyway? Oh wait

Only until Pandaren can be Warlocks!
Only until Pandaren can be Warlocks!

10) ORC

Frankly I think we’re all sick of them by now. BRING ON THE DEMONS.

Comedically large shoulders though, so that saves them from oblivion.

Hi. I'm an overused antagonist.
Hi. I’m an overused antagonist.

9) TROLL

We’re all waiting on the inevitable Troll raid in Legion. I mean we went a whole expansion with nary a Trollish hand raised against us! Blasphemy!

Hi. I'm an overused antagonist too. Mon.
Hi. I’m an overused antagonist too. Mon.

8) GNOME

So we get to some difficult decisions now, and Gnomes get the short end of the stick.

Get it? SHORT end? SHORT end?

Ohohohoho!

They give 100% sassface though.
They give 100% sassface though.

7) FORSAKEN

Owners of some of the most rad hairstyles in the game, but with a disappointing habit of having bones appear through everything. Even plate for some reason.

"DEATH TO THE LIVING" whoa there settle down
“DEATH TO THE LIVING” whoa there settle down

6) TAUREN

COW PEOPLE. MOO!

They also have comedically large shoulders, and are all peace & love!

Sadly not called Retbull
Sadly not called Retbull

5) DRAENEI

Tentacled space goats with booty.

Yes, even the men.

disgleirio2

4) GOBLINS

They may be locked into their start experience just like the Worgen, but the difference is that the Goblin start area is actually FUN, and that’s what’s important, kids.

IT'S BEHIND YOU
IT’S BEHIND YOU

3) BLOOD ELVES

The men aren’t the size of houses and are voiced by Liquid Snake. The ladies all give better sassface than even Gnomes.

Plus that casting animation:

DeMolauy

It’s like he’s saying “BITCH I’M AMAZING, CONSIDER YOURSELF LUCKY THAT I AM THE LAST THING YOU’LL EVER SEE.”

2) DWARVES

Poundshopwig and his resplendent beard have really made me fall in love with the diminutive Dwarven race! Being able to turn into stone every so often is pretty damn cool too.

But that beard. THAT BEARD. It demands respect and inspires fear. I envy the lushness and fullness, when all I can grow are smoky wisps of nothing. He oils it every day so that it may inspire all who come into contact with it.

poundshopwig

1) PANDAREN

Like you’re shocked by this. Really.

 

I AM
I AM

I mean have we met?

Not that I'm aware of
Not that I’m aware of

Pandaren are the BOMB, yo.

TOPLESS PANDA PARTY TIME
TOPLESS PANDA PARTY TIME
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One thought on “The OFFICIAL “Best Races in World of Warcraft” List!

    Jaedia said:
    March 18, 2016 at 9:09 pm

    Dude. DUDE. I don’t think we can be friends anymore. Soupdragon has some stuff to say about this. I MEAN -REALLY-!

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